Discipline Today
So one of my favorite blogging buds Tot's Mom has sent me a great tag. The question is how do I discipline my child. Besides answering that I'm going to give you some of my own thoughts on it as well. Well discipline is tough when your kids is only 16 months old. I don't think he has a clear understanding of what is right and wrong at this point. However I know he is learning when I am not happy with him. For example sometimes when I tell him no he will hug or kiss me right after I say it. He knows that a hug or kiss is very pleasing to me. So I suppose he can tell I was upset and thinks ok if I hug her she will be happy with me. It's really cute but quite magnificent at the same time. It goes to show you just how basic our emotional needs are. We want to feel loved and feel that we are pleasing our parents, partners, bosses whatever. His actions are direct proof of this.
As far as methods of discipline go.. I feel it is a very important part of every parents life and that we really need to stick to whatever we decide to do. For me hitting is not going to be an option. My mom hit us and I have bad memories associated with that. I absolutely do not want to pass that on to my son. For now what I do is the typical NO and then go into a distraction activity. This is working now at this age. When he really is doing something is isn't suppose to do. I will say no and hold his hands for a minute until he feels uncomfortable then I will let them go. I did this when he went for the dog food and he has never touched it again. I also did this when he reached for the dials on the stove.
I'm trying to teach him to communicate as well. Many times when he can't reach a toy or something goes under the couch he will grunt or whine. When he does this I will tell him to say I need help, or stuck or something appropriate to the situation. He can't articulate yet so this is what he does and I think it's completely appropriate for 16 months. Now as he grows I guess we will just have to be flexible and figure out what he will respect and just make sure we follow through on the decision.
I think follow through is probably one of the most important aspects of discipline.
As far as methods of discipline go.. I feel it is a very important part of every parents life and that we really need to stick to whatever we decide to do. For me hitting is not going to be an option. My mom hit us and I have bad memories associated with that. I absolutely do not want to pass that on to my son. For now what I do is the typical NO and then go into a distraction activity. This is working now at this age. When he really is doing something is isn't suppose to do. I will say no and hold his hands for a minute until he feels uncomfortable then I will let them go. I did this when he went for the dog food and he has never touched it again. I also did this when he reached for the dials on the stove.
I'm trying to teach him to communicate as well. Many times when he can't reach a toy or something goes under the couch he will grunt or whine. When he does this I will tell him to say I need help, or stuck or something appropriate to the situation. He can't articulate yet so this is what he does and I think it's completely appropriate for 16 months. Now as he grows I guess we will just have to be flexible and figure out what he will respect and just make sure we follow through on the decision.
I think follow through is probably one of the most important aspects of discipline.
Definitely the key -- follow-through. I share your thoughts on no-hitting, too. Great post!
Mike
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I an a new visitor, I found your site through the Toddler Humor blog. Anyway, I agree with your view on discipline. I agree whole heartedly that this is the age to teach them how to express them selves positively and with words, and following through is the key to making easier so they know what to expect. I am glad to see other parents who are on the same page
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... or you can take a cue from your neighbor and just yell "shut the door asshole!"
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Nice post. Too young to really discipline and you are guiding/coaching your kid the best way (at least I think so). No hitting is fine, but if my toddler runs towards a busy street she gets a wack on her butt. I usually resort to timeouts and labor for punishment. Corporal punishment is also effective. Jumping jacks, push ups and laps around the house (outside) all work wonders. My grandfather-in-law had a great way to discipline older children as he made them memorize classic literature (poems mostly). I will employ that technique when my girls get older at least as a testament to his creativity.
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Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I find the distraction method works for my toddler as well but as he grows, it is losing its effectiveness. Time for me to think of something else now.
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Oh I'm going to have to try the holding his hands thing. Ace just loves dog food. He waits till I turn my back and there he goes...straight for the dog food bowl to get a mouth full. Thanks for the tip!
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